Queen Of Dirt

This isn’t neccessarily new news. When something is a week old in celebrity land, it’s officially old. But I’m posting anyway cause it’s another edition of one of these things are not like the other. Two weeks ago, Drew Barrymore and new love-of-her-life Justin Long were celebrating her 33rd with a little beach va-cay and I can’t help but think that Justin is looking more and more like Domenico (of Tila Tequila and That’s Amore! reality-fame)…

I can’t be the only one that freaks out everytime I flip on the tv and I see Brad Pitt next to a young Dustin Hoffman and gets really confused…until I realize, once again, I’ve been duped and I’m really looking at Robert Redford. Seriously its freaky how much they look alike. It’s also pretty amazing that Brad Pitt can do circa 1970’s Robert Redford better than circa 1970’s Robert Redford.

Another on the looks-so-much-alike-they-could-be-same-person list… Danny Noriega (this years Sanjaya on American Idol) and Jessica Alba. Oh no, I’ve probably just ruined fantasies for straight men everywhere. And some lesbians. And gay guys. So, prettymuch everyone. Oops.

Oh and here’s the cover of the latest issue of Paper magazine. It’s so whore-ific. What were they thinking? It’s not 1992 and this is not the set of ‘Married with Children’. Or a 1970’s adult movie. Just awful.

Lindsay Lohan channeled Marilyn Monroe for famed photographer Bert Stern for the latest edition of New York magazine. Bert Stern is known for shooting Marilyn’s infamous last sitting pictures, photographed 6 weeks before her death in 1962.

You know LL flipped her lid over this. She has long been obsessed with Marilyn, saying before that she thought she looked like her and felt a connection with her. Lindsay even went so far as to buy one of Marilyn’s apartments in El Palacio last year.

She did a pretty decent job as a Marilyn lookalike although, and I hate to admit it, the dumb blond that really took the cake as far as I’m concerned was Anna Nicole. She channeled the look (the pre-Marilyn Norma Jeane and ‘Marilyn Monroe’) and the fact that she basically created and branded her look, turning herself into a totally different person.

Also? Charlize Theron does a pretty amazing MM.

Mischa Barton got an extreme hair makeover recently and magically turned into a Gwyneth Paltrow clone.

Now she just needs to find a british rocker beau and the transformation will be complete.

I love Katherine Moennig from the L Word. I think she is gorgeous. That being said, she always reminded me of someone and it came to me the other day. Joey McIntyre from New Kids on the Block.

Which makes complete sense considering when I was 8, I was convinced I was going to marry him in all of his faded-jeans-cut-out-top-hat glory.

Speaking of New Kids, they are getting back together! Seriously?? They are 40.

Thats so ridiculous that I would totally pay to see that shit.

Choreographed dancing to The Right Stuff. Hanging Tough. Please Don’t Go Girl… Awesome.

Here is Ashton Kutcher in a new ad for Pepe Jeans London looking exactly like previous America’s Next Top Model winner Jaslene (when she was in her ‘boy’ photoshoot).

I must say I still can’t believe what a convincing boy she made in that shoot considering Jaslene looks like Janice Dickenson in her prime.

She makes a really pretty boy. And that just confuses me.

I finally realized why Zac Efron geeks me out (besides the whole singing and dancing thing)… I knew he reminded me of someone and it hit me today- he is a dead ringer for Daniela Sea from The L Word.

I showed Autumn, a work friend, the pictures and she said.”Isn’t that the same person?”

And I had to explain, “No, Daniela actually admits she’s gay, whereas Zac…” Let’s just say I’m prettysure he likes the men-folk.

Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

The proof is in his eyes. Those eyes cannot be hetero-eyes.